Thanks jollyrodgers,

what you describes has been my usual downwind technique up til now. Fast and a bit scary as it feels like the boat takes you for a ride instead of you sailing the boat.
But I will be trying to 'stall out' as described earlier, at the next opportunity (even tough this also sounds scary).

I have never tried to catch the boom during a jibe in heavy wind. But I grab the mainsheet between the blocks early in the jibe, and throws the main over to the new side when I'm almost DDW.