Avoid going head-to-the-wind at all costs. The waves will set you back and there will likely be rudder damage or worse. Keep the boat moving, and balance your sails so you'll keep going even with relatively little rudder input. To bear off, the jib should be sheeted more than the main, and to head up, the opposite. I've had the best luck centering the traveller and twisting the main to make thrust down low, while having the crew play the jib sheet for maximum power. Best of luck! It's ok not to go if it's too scary - worst is wind and waves both directly onshore. Best is beam reach in and out.

Enjoy!