I'm assuming you're going through Orlando. It's the Florida Turnpike that takes off to the east from I-75. It's right around Wildwood. Be sure you're in one of the left lanes as you approach the left sweeper to the east onto the Turnpike. If you're on the outside lanes you will be headed toward Tampa. Watch that exit for confused tourists as they realize at the last minute that they are in the wrong lane and make kamikaze maneuvers between the truckers to correct their error. If you screwup, make sure your window is down so that you can yell "Starboard!" or "Water!" at the truckers. They will appreciate your attentiveness by agreeing with long blasts of their horn and a visual treat of smoking their rear trailer tires. Neato.

Watchout for speed traps around Live Oak; way east of Tallahassee.

"Quebec" or "Ontario" on a license plate is French for "I've been sleeping since Georgia."

From I-10, don't become so hypnotized that you miss the right turn from I-10 onto I-75. From there it will be thick until you get to the Flarduh Turnpike which was renamed "Ronald Reagan Parkway" but nobody calls it that because EVERY parkway was renamed for His Befuddledness. If you miss the turn onto I-75 you can launch at Jacksonville Beach.

I've heard that there are a lot of students in Gainesville and that beer is also sold there. I think some of them drink the beer and then drive around. I'm always extra careful going through Gainesville unless it's on a Sunday morning when they're all in church. There used to be a lot of football traffic through Gainesville; even during football season.

On I-4 in Orlando there are two speed limits: 7mph and 70mph. There is no in-between. Orlando will be recognized by the sea of Ohio license plates.

Happy Motoring!