When I crew on other's boats the first thing I say is that the skipper can tell me to shut up at any time. It's their boat and if they want advice or whatever from me I'll give it to them, but if they don't want it I'll shut up. It's only fair.

For crew on my boat I take a lot of advice and input and help, but the ultimate decision is left to me. That way if it was the wrong decision it's my fault and responsibility. I'll curse myself and situations, but never my crew. If somebody comes onto my boat and feels they have to run it without talking it over, well, that's their problem. And as crew you sometimes follow decisions you don't agree with or understand, but that's part of the game (as long as safety isn't involved).

I imagine on pro boats these relationships are understood up front. If it doesn't work out and egos get in the way you're off the boat, and if you say you won't sail with whathisname again, you might end up not sailing with anybody again.

It's a game - we all need to keep that in perspective! For friendships to be lost is a shame, but that only means that one or both parties have lost that perspective...