Pete, I don't necessarily dismiss your suggestion, but I'm not sure of all the logistics.

So I find a tar ball on the sand. I scoop it up and put it in my sand bucket (no self-respecting beachgoer shows up without one, right), take it to a retailer (only BP? Why not any retailer?) who gives me a $ per pound of the goop?

And the fishermen somehow scoop up the sheen to return to the retailer for a similar fee/pound?

Sounds reasonable in principle, but just don't know if it'd work out on a large scale - we've got lots of coastline.

And it might be a good way to get rid of some leftover waste oil at my plant without having to pay a haz-mat disposal company

Speaking of waste oil, those quick-lube folks do wear gloves and other protective equipment. That stuf does have some nasties in it from combustion and wear of the metallic parts in the motor. But refined oil was put in there in the first place, which is "better" than the raw crude spitting out into the water, right? You chemists can chime in here...

I know of several retailers who are currently with BP. What I find strangely ironic was that the reason they switched to BP (some were with Mobil, one with Chevron, and one with Shell) was that BP was the only company willing to help them pay for underground tank replacement - so the fuel wouldn't contaminate the groundwater.... Who would have thunk-it?