. . . As you were,

It is time to gather at the Rams Head, Downtown, Annapolis!

Agenda: None / to many to list

As I want you to be,

Place: Rams Head, 33 West Street, Annapolis; Downstairs or maybe up stairs, look around; you can bet we won’t be far from one of the bars

As a friend,

Directions: www.mapquest.com;
http://www.mapquest.com/maps/map.ad...t&city=&state=&zipcode=21401

As an old enemy,

Date: Friday, 3 February 2006

Take your time,

Time: 7:30 pm

Hurry up,

Attire: Wear your fleet colors (WRCRA T-shirt; A-Class; CRAC; WRSC)!

The choice is yours,

Drink Special: tbd; probably none

Don’t be late,

RSVP: Not necessary.

Take a rest,

However, it would be nice to know so I won’t be there drinkin’ and lying to me self!

As a friend,

SpinSheet (Mary, Dave and Staff), APS Crew, New England Catamarans (Rick), and Wetasschronicles (Tim) come on out and join usAs an old memoria,

selfish bump

Chris - I just can't keep up with all the straight lines you're feeding me.

Anyway, I got permission from the Admiral and will be there!

Any cat sailors in the area - come on out!

That almost sounds like it would be worth the trip from South Cackalaky.

Come on up! I'll buy you a round!

I would be there but I have to work,,,to support my boat habit!!! Drink a couple of cold ones for me, please. Ed

Call in sick, I'll write you a doctor's note. I can make the disease be mild, wild, or really scary depending on how picky your boss is and how much time off you want!

That smells like Nirvana,

Oh nevermind...

at least someone is serving them up for you:)

C U Tonight Kap'n!

Keith,

would that be according to the standard CTCAE scale of severeity?

1-Mild
2-Moderate
3-Severe
4-Life-threatening

?
inquiring minds want to know.

Here's where I would typically warn people not ask some questions, but since you already asked. No, I prefer my own scale:

1-Mildy annoying to you. Can enjoy a day of hookie. Sinus headache and the like, easily faked but also easily endured if real. Worth a day off. Make sure you don't come back to work with more tan than before, which may require planning.

2-Mildy annoying to others. Constant sniffling, clearing of throat, whiny complaining that you may be coming down with something. Bad backs, sore joints, etc. may qualify. Good as a set-up to a day off, real or faked.

3-Amusing as Hell to others. Broken limbs from attempting things you couldn't do in your youth let alone now. Catching something from someone doing something that can't be shown on network TV. Any illness or injury that may have happened immediately after having said "hey everybody, watch this". Try to avoid either in reality or by faking, unless you're pressed and REALLY need the day off. The risk here is that your co-workers are as warped as you, and will make sure you come to work so that they can mock you.

4-Scary as Hell to others. Co-workers run for cover from flying droplets expelled during coughs and sneezes. They have an urge to sanitize anything you touch after watching you wipe your nose. They're not comforted by the revelation your kid brought this to you from school. Too sick to enjoy a day off, you may as well go to work and make others miserable until boss forces you to leave.

5-Scary to you. Deep coughs and pains, stomach cramps, uncontrolled eliminations. Start to think that dying is preferable even though you know you're being a wuss. Day off is only option if real. Only use as fake occasionally unless you really are an attention hog and need people to be constantly concerned about you.

6-Scary as Hell to you and others. Open sores and pustules. May not be life-threatening, but yuck factor is high. Lots of public attention to your weird spots. Feel too sick to do anything, however going out in public just to see old people point and little children cry makes it all worth while. Your petri dish of a body is now fascinating enough that you ignore the extreme discomfort to show others the brand-new lesion that just formed on your eyelid.

7-Scary as Hell to you, others, and the CDC. Parts are falling off. The blackish/green spot on your ear has consumed it and your glasses no longer fit properly. Lots of peril to you and your furniture. Definitely a good call for getting a day or two off, but you may have to prove to your boss that it's this bad because it's a little rare.

8-Death. Characterized by persistent inertness. The best bet for time off, from work at least. Depending on the afterlife you're destined for the prospects for time off may actually be very bleak. Faking this for time off from work is actually more effort than work itself.

9-It's not you. By far the most severe level is if you are ok but your child is ill for more than the obvious reason. Threaten to bring your sick child to work if you can't stay at home. Works like a charm, real or fake. They might give you extra time off to make sure you won't be a carrier of whatever your spawn contracted back to the office to share with everyone else.

I don't need no stinkin excuses,,,or badges. It is my PLAN to suck as much OT out of my company as I can in the winter in order to sail and travel to regattas when it's warm. I thought it was a good idea but then it killed me that Friday was 60+ and I was stuck ashore. Hey,,,,,how bout a post partum report from you ladies? Ed

I couldn't make it out this time, but if it's anything like years past, Chris got all drunk and stumbled into the womens bathroom and stopped up the "terlit" (as he likes to call it). He apparently takes great pride in this as it happens EVERY year.

Hee hee . . . sorry Chris . . I couldn't resist.

- Mike

Hmmm . . . . Going on the offensive Mike instead of being defensive is one of my favorite techniques . . . . combine it with the truth and . . . well . . . its hard to refute.

I’m surprised Mike that you chose that tradition to comment about since it was your idea 4 years ago, and your coercion of me by “. . . dude it takes two to stop up these girly rooms properly . . .” and “ . . . any two-holer will do…” Common, everyone who knows me knows I seldom, if ever, have an original idea.

Not knowing what was in store for their ladies room latter that evening the Ram’s Head management saved me a parking spot right out in front for the amount of “business” I was bringing them, little did they know. Little did I know that a fight would breakout on the sidewalk by the front door. Thankfully, Statefarm was not needed this time.

I don’t recall any “showing of stern.” Although . . . oh nevermind.

In explaining my crew situation, I believe I gained a 9th crewmember. Expertly recognizing and exploiting the dynamic between husband and wife was essential to this accomplishment. It seems I only needed to ask her if she “would enjoy beating her husbands team?”

Our Commodore and his crew Nate, and Fleet Kap’t Keith were present and engaging as always. The WRSC Rear Commodore and his wife were present and as always gracious. Capt. Geiger represented the 6.0 fleet. The A Class was well represented, even without CrewDog. You were missed man! We left at 1 am and the Gumby Team was still under full sail. How late did you “Workie?” FEAR the DUCK!!

I got to reward the best sailmaker, RacerX, with a little alcohol for he and his lovely wife. Of course, he also got more work from me.

Naturally their were pitchpoll stories, car mechanic stories, toll road discussions, how to handle a piece of African mahogany that’s 10/4 by 12 by 50, good beer/bad beers opinions, leaners, Tybee 500, Florida races, Nirvana RC Racing, and Youth program discussions.

On a serious note, there was a toast raised to the two members of our sailing community that recently passed away.

Back to the frivolity,

CRAC was way under represented. Capt. Schneider was the only rep, other than us with dual allegiance to WRCRA, WRSC, and CRAC. Oh yeah, Seacats was not represented.

The Relentless Bastards Team was not represented until their wives showed up. This is a big benefit since they are much nicer to look at, smell a lot better and are always worth talking with.

I do recall hearing “If I have to hear one more T20 story I’m going to leave!” Nothing like a little good-natured resentment, eh Mark?

Need to thank Todd and Leanne for agreeing to ride with me. And, Leanne for sitting in the back seat of the Cobra and Todd for scoping out the “Reserved for Mr. Allen” parking spot right in front of the Ram’s Head door. Only draw back was, I decided to stay in fourth gear and 1600 rpms for the comfort of me passengers, instead of second and third gear on one of my favorite ramps to Annapoli.

Back to Mike, at least you show up when you agree to crew, which is the only important time to show.

I would hope that there are other opinions and representations of the evening forth coming. If they differ in content, well then only I know the truth; it doesn’t mean I represented it above. Maybe even a picture or two will follow.

Well . . . since there have been no subsequent renditions of our Invasion, let the record show that after considerable diligence to time and opportunity passing my version of the afore mentioned evening is the truth and factual as stated in its entirety. Any utterances of rebuttal after this point shall be considered pure blaspheme and wholly discounted.

Oh yeah, here is one picture documenting the evening. Can you name the characters?

Keith, now I know why you insisted the Polynesians were out of the picture. Lets see as I recall “ . . . a little more to the left, a little more, just a little more, there…” I think we are all onto you now.

Herein submitted by your never humble nor obedient representative in my full self-appointedness,

Those guys? Man, all they wanted to do was tell me about how they invented the modern beer I was drinking! When I (and everybody should) know that modern beer is the sole invention of the American Annheiser Busch Corporation! It was all "grains" this and "starches converted to sugars" that, and "yeast pooping out alcohol" or some other blather. When I know it took A/B to add rice and more water to make the true modern beer we all love! Sheesh! I'm pretty sure the Polynesians didn't even have Clydesdales back then!

Joking, joking, joking, joking... I firmly believe any beverage produced by the Polynesians, ancient or otherwise, would taste far and away better than anything from A/B (I'm sure that statement will get me in trouble). No resemblance to any history of Clydesdales (or horses for that matter) should be implied. History of beer, the Budweiser name, pilsner style or ingredients, etc. - see previous statement about horses. No Polynesians, ancient or otherwise were harmed in the making of this post. However, a certain balding, fat, eurocentric guy did get a hangnail. Hopefully he'll survive the amputation with his dignity intact.

Arrrggg...now we're talking about American beer? Watch this wreck.