Wow, all that rain is really making you testy!
While I agree with most of that rant, the other thing to consider is that advanced racing tactics call for the starboard boat to know whether you really want the port boat to tack, or whether you want to wave him across to get him out of your way.
Usually, this is only done when the sailors are very familiar with one another's capabilities. Hand jestures can also be confusing when it's windy.
I doubt that was the case here, but it's just another thing to think about when on the water.
Mike