If only the 30 Million Moran (sic) March had gotten more than 20 people to show up. Then everything would be right in the world.
The trending hashtag on the Twitters has been #AmericanSpringExcuses
1. They couldn’t figure out a way to get there without using a government-built road. 2. They were there, but you couldn't see them because of the cammo 3. BENGHAZI 4. It’s meth-cooking season, so couldn’t leave their meth labs. 5. It was national discount day at Golden Corral. 6. There were too many puddles to navigate around. 7. COPS was being filmed in their trailer park that day and didn’t want to miss an opportunity to be on television. 8. There was a Duck Dynasty marathon on A & E all day. 9. Saw a rainbow over Washington, and turned around, thinking that getting near it might make them gay. 10. They were given ultimatums by their cousins that they’d break up with them if they left for a day or two. 11. Roadway sign said "Washington Left", so they did 12. Illegal to ride lawn mowers on the streets of Washington. 13. They couldn’t find their teeth, and they don’t go out without them. 14. If you count the voices in the heads of the people who showed up, there were 30 million people there. 15. Just finishing up the signs. How many "K"s in Amerikka? 16. Wanted to march against tyrannical min.wage but can't afford it. Thanks Obama! 17. Had doctor's appt. I have health care now for some reason. 18. Told Librl troll I'd show up after the first nonwhite person did. 19. Our grassroots funding from the Kochs were late to arrive. 20. Everybody stayed home for fear the internet comments would be left untended. 21. Truck is on concrete blocks in front of our house. 22. The Reid/Pelosi embargo on battery packs for Rascals.
